-Thursday, December 20, 2001-
YAY i saw Lord of the Rings yesterday!! it was so good. I'm officially in love with Legolas Greenleaf. He's damn sexy. I think he even surpasses Antonio Banderas. I'm using him as my first layout subject. I even have a screen shot of the prototype splash page! :D:D:D sorry for the poopy load time, TBNS is a craphead. I can't wait to get my domain. *_*_* I'm gonna ask for all Lord of the Rings stuff for my birthday *cackle* hehehehe...

-Tuesday, December 11, 2001-
Mah, i went to the band concert tonight, i played everything, it made me dizzy, woo woo. I didn't stay for the other bands because i wanted to go home, shower, and go to bed, the last two which i will do after i finish this. All day i was a bum, sat on the computer, watched The King and I, read Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, and talked to Corrigan on the telephone. Dad got me some chocolate pocky. Chocolate pocky is good. I ache all over. I can't wait to dope up on nyquil. I was a dolt and last night i forgot the stuff even existed, so i didn't sleep well at all. i'll go to school tomorrow and whatnot, but i dont think i'll take the pre-cal test, i need more practice, and being absent two days will help me with not having to take it. i'm so tired. My whole family is in a tense grumpy mood. I'm glad i work tomorrow. Its an escape from home and school.

oh, Brandon was let go...he had one too many cash shortages. ;_; we were talking last night, and he seemed mad at me that i didn't tell him the night before that i knew he was going to be fired. I didn't really know, John had told me and i thought it already happened, and Brandon just didn't want to tell me of it. I dont ask about things i dont know are true, either, and i knew if it was true, Brandon would tell me in his own time. So yeah, he was mad that i didnt say anything. *sigh* I can't really win. Oh well. I just hope he's not still mad at me by friday, as he and i are going to Janice's for her birthday.

I am so ready for this semester to be over. I'll be 17 when i go back to school, that's kind of a cool thought. Man, i can't beleive i'll be 17. I'm quite used to being 16, 17 seems very much older. Its usual for all my friends to be 17 or 18, but me? I'm always 16. Its weird to think about, its just some stupid number or a label, but i remember being babysat by 17 and 18 year olds and being all "woah i'm gonna be cool like him/her when i'm 17, i'll be all grown up then". Alisa's almost 20, Kendie's 17, Janice is 18, Brandon is 22, John is almost 22, Corrigan is 19, i'm so growing up. Whats 17...17 is R-movie age, 17 is buying porn and hentai, but not getting into porn and hentai movies/cons (*sob* no yaoi con yet), 17 is legal age of consent in texas *grin*...And i'm a psycho, obviously. o.O

*sigh* anyway, bed is beckoning me. g'night.

-Monday, December 10, 2001-
I am sick. I feel like crap. I am going to go to bed now. I won't be at school tomorrow. but i will try to go to the concert. I love band.

-Monday, December 10, 2001-

Are you a Bitter Hermit?

I AM 60% BITTER HERMIT. I have no idea who I am and The Bitter Hermits don't either. I should get some professional help before I infect them too!

Chance I would leave my home voluntarily: The Voices Say I Can’t Chance I would leave my computer voluntarily: She’s Pretty

-Saturday, December 8, 2001-
Yay look at Kayla feel like crap. At least i'm wearing my sparkly sweater. My throat hurts and i've sneezed a lot. I dont think i have a fever though. Work was busy tonight. I've spent a good 70% of my paycheck, and all but 17 dollars of it on gifts. the 17 dollars went to a belt for myself. Its a studded black leather belt. meow. I bought something for mom, dad, ben, Jonathan, Erik, and Janice. I need to buy stuff for Kendie, Corrigan, and Marianne definitely, but i dont know what to get them. I'm so tired. I feel like crap. I talked to Kendall about my parents last night. I hate it, i hate talking about them, its the same problem every time. I should just shut up and accept that they'll never treat me as old as i am, much less as old as i act. Maybe i should just act like a 16 year old and have stupid friends. Maybe then they would treat me like a 16 year old. Who wants to hear my bullshit all the time? Its such crap. Yeah Kayla is a loser. Corrigan came by my store tonight. Kayla's in love. But its weird cause half the time I'm more frightened that i'll lose him than anything. I mean...i'm putting kendall out because of all this, i'm invading her time with me to see this guy because i'm scared that he'll dump me like David did. I'm such a selfish bastard. I put my wants in front of my parents, my best friend, and my boyfriend. I think it would be more convenient for everybody if i just moved or died or something. Yep. Then nobody would have to put up with my crap. damn thats a nice thought, everybody happy. geez, i feel like Florence in The Odd Couple, so fucking in love with her problems, i absolutely love hating myself. Kind of sick though, it makes me hate myself even more. YAY I'm a winner!! *sigh* my throat hurts.

-Thursday, December 6, 2001-
meyaaow...I am listening to techno music. O_o For no apparent reason. I guess its just my electronica mood today...much attention to the web-design and flashwork. I'm trying to work a password system into my Plaid Kitty website but its not working so well because i think i have to have a domain to do so, cause i need a CGI-BIN directory, which the freeservers (including envy.nu) doesn't provide. Sooo, that leaves me to having a domain, which i want anyway...i'm definitely going to lean toward one for christmas. Ohhh i'd have so much more freedom with my own server. *_* *gush* Blah i'll go now. Poke more at my webspace. X3...

-Tuesday, December 4, 2001-
Well, i'm feeling better. I know how i'm going to deal with the whole parents-versus-lovelife situation...i'm just going to be damned bull headed with it. Its what i want, i know its what i want, and i know its right, and dammit, its my life! *growl* ^_^ yeah. See, i get in a much beter mood when i'm resolved on a plan of action. I got my progress report today too, 2 As, 2 Bs, a 79 in Pre-cal, and no grade in band O_o; yay for band. ^^;

Last week my mum took my Virgin Suicides book from my room. So i took it back. It offends me when she takes things from my room. She asked where it went, i said i took it back. She said i shouldn't read smut, and if i'd already read it. I said it wasn't smut, and of course i have read it. Blah blah, its not even smut. Its a really damn good book. Its not MY fault she doesn't like to read. *growl*

My boys at Sam Goody didn't have any Vanessa Mae CDs when i checked today. *cry* I need to get some Vanessa Mae CDs. She's so cool. I wish i could play violin sometimes. Mou...

-Sunday, December 2, 2001-
Oh yeah. And I was late to work because of church. And I had to clean the freaking bathroom. Yay for scrubbing the bathtub, now my hands reek of bleach. WHEE!! oh, oh, and school is tomorrow...i have my History Fair paper due tuesday, and i have some stupid presentation tomorrow for English. Progress Reports do come out Tuesday, maybe my grades can redeem something about myself to my parents. Oh well. I have my harry potter books, my camera, and my art.

-Sunday, December 2, 2001-
My parents saw Corrigan's class ring around my neck last night and had a fit. I sat up an hour being lectured. If i'd have told them before, they would have flat out told me no. I can't do this. I cried more last night than i have in months. I was an absolute zombie the last couple hours i worked, i was shaking all day, but i think that was sugar low. Brandon and I took our break together, he bought me lunch, and we talked a whole lot. Well, i didn't do a lot of talking. I hate telling people my problems, and sometimes i just dont have the words. Corrigan came in at the very end of my shift, and by then i felt like shit and just wanted to go home, i think i was fairly rude to him. I dont know what i'm going to do. I really dont. Its honestly between my heart and my parents. Because even my head tells me this is right. I can't go against what i truly beleive, can I? Just because my parents say 'no'? I dont even understand their reasons, Its not my fault i can't stand 3/4 of my high school class because its full of idiots. If anything, its because they've raised me to be more mature than my age. Then they turn around and tell me that there's nothing wrong with being a normal 16 year old. Well you know what, I dont think they know a "normal 16 year old" for what one is, at least in MY school. When they were 16, i'm sure they didn't see themselves for what a normal 16 year old really is. I just dont know what to do. I mean...no matter how much i debate with them, none of it counts, i can never get anywhere past 'no'. And i hate deceiving them. They seem to think i enjoy it, or dont care. No, i care, and i'm honestly torn between my complete head over heels feelings for this boy, and the fact that i want to please the parents that i dont think any other teenager would be able to put up with. I HATE THIS

-Friday, November 30, 2001-

If I was a James Bond villain, I would be Ernst Stavro Blofeld. I enjoy fluffy white cats, dropping people in piranha pools, and initiating World War III. I am played by Donald Pleasence in You Only Live Twice. Who would you be? James Bond Villain Personality Test

-Thursday, November 29, 2001-
Yes! ER comes on tonight! ER good.

I get to wear my beloved red plaid skirt tomorrow! I'm going out after school, then i'm going back to school for the premiere showing of the male version of the Odd Couple, then i'll go back to kendie's to stay the night. yaay. mweeeeeeeeee i get to wear my brand new sweater to work on Saturday. Baha. ^____^ I'm in a good mood today. I've been working on my new website, and i made a flash video for Webmastering. productive! Unfortunately i still have to do my History Fair paper. O_o blah.

Yeah, last night i woke up to the unpleasant sounds of my brother puking up his guts at 3:20 AM. blah. He was puking about ever half hour for the remainder of the night, and some more today, but he seems better now. I better not get whatever the hell it is that he has. x.x

-Monday, November 26, 2001-
I love my punk druggie fascist friends. I really do. Every day i eat lunch with these guys. They occasionally come and visit me at work. They're cool. 3 or 4 freshmen, 2 juniors, and i think the rest are sophomores. Yeah.

-Monday, November 26, 2001-
mah, i gave Marianne her Fushigi Yuugi OVAs back today. *sob* Its okay, I'll get my Weiss Kreuz next week, and my Five Iron Frenzy CD tomorrow. I have to go home today, no being social. I need to sleep, seeing as how i got 2 hours of sleep last night. We were reviewing in Pre Cal, so i slept through that. Corrigan says he'll come get me from school tomorrow! I dont know if i can go though, as i dont want to be home late, and my parents would wonder who i got dropped off by. If its early enough, I could have dinner with kendie, but i'm imposing enough on her already. I want to see Corrigan. *whine*

Bah, lunch time.

-Sunday, November 25, 2001-
mou. i was a bad girl. I bought myself a new sweater and a new pair of earrings. I ate pizza for dinner, twice! Once at work, where i caught up with Colin, the B.Dalton guy who holds my manga back without me even asking, i had Sbarro with him. Then i came home and had Fat Daddys. Wow...i just thought about it...i know sooo many people in the mall. Lessee...Colin from B.Dalton, the Lens Crafters guy, Huy at Cookie Company and in 2 of my classes, the whole arcade crew, David the Sam Goody dude, that annoying Wetzels Pretzels dude, the Cinnabon guys, and of course, my crew. Yay for working in the mall. David says he'll get my FIF CD in Tuesday probably. *cry* I want it now! I also want to go thrift shopping. but i always want to do that.

Uhhghhh. School tomorrow. But only for 3ish weeks. Ew, 3 weeks and 3 days. >:| But finals week doesn't really count. So 3 weeks. I think i'm gonna go home after school tomorrow. It sucks beign in high school when everybody at work thinks, or at least thought at one point, i am older than 18, 19, or even 20 in some cases. bahhh. People in high school think im a senior. Blah. some day i'm going to dress as childish as i can. But that will just make me look older. And turn weird guys on. -_-;;;;;; MOoo!!!!!!! *growl*

-Saturday, November 24, 2001-
You know, sometimes i wish i could have something to write about. yeah, boring kid i am. I'm just kind of staring at the screen. Things are flying through my head but nothing is coming through in a coherent form. Bad things are flying through my head, i know that. I'm not in a good mood tonight. Oh well. have to get off the computer now anyway, like a good little girl, so mandate my parents. Good night. -_-;

-Saturday, November 24, 2001-
What would you do for a Klondike Bar?

-Wednesday, November 21, 2001-
Here, Matt, an old design for a skateboard deck that i never got time to paint. If you really really want to see stuff, namely my really old junk on my poor website i never update, go here. Other than that, i've nothing floating around the internet that i know of, so you'll have to wait until i either get un-lazy enough to re-install my scanner, or till i get to school on monday so i can scan some things i might want to show humanity. Sooo, min'na, looks like you'll get an art update monday if you're lucky! Ugh, my art has sucked lately, i've absolutely no inspiration. *sigh* ;_; it makes JunJun sad, she loves to draw, but alas, she cannot lately. Everything sucks. And i dont mean that in the depressey "life sucks, blah blah", no, i just mean that in that *I* suck. Only myself, nobody fret, nothing else sucks too bad. Baha. I keep telling myself "oh you'll draw something good tonight", or "if you get this kind of art device, you can do something cool with it" but no, nothing good comes out unless it has to, like for newspaper or for a friend. Maybe watercolors tonight. There's a sketch i have that i'd like to paint. I want to make pretty dramatic inspired things. But i cant make pretty things, i can't make dramatic things, and apparently i can't do inspired things either.

Dammit, i'm really cold. Probably the cold milk and cold pizza i'm eating. Mahhhhh blanket now. *is cold* *cry* *continues drinking cold milk* *is not smart*

*burp* ¬.¬ yeah, i'm going to go now. play Final Fantasy IX...draw perhaps...YAY draw, i'll turn out more CRAP, woo!! *glower depressed angsty growl* *cry*

-Wednesday, November 21, 2001-
Yay look at me researching domain names. I'm seriously considering http://www.junners.net, http://www.juno-chan.org, http://www.tasuki.cc. I'm going to ask for a domain for christmas. :3 ^_^ Whee!! and now back to downloading punk rock christmas songs for work *grin*

-Monday, November 19, 2001-
I finally weined Dad's precious Nikon out of him. Kendall asked why i didn't borrow hers, but i hate borrowing other people's equipment. I've used dad's Nikon before, so i know how it acts and everything, i trust myself with it. i took some photos last night, and today i'm going to do more stuff. Friday i'll put them into Eckerd's to get developed, seeing as how its crappy 100 speed Kodak color film anyway. And i have no access to a darkroom. ;_; Man, outdoors is beckoning me...i kept my windows open last night, and now my room smells so good, and i'm sitting here next to an open window, and its so nice out there. I think i'm gonna go down to the park with my camera. This is my only day off this week! I'm still gonna go up to the mall though, as i need mom to order my glasses from LensCrafters. Theyre really cool thick black frames with ovaled eyepieces. :D:D Melikes. And they're 100$, not the 200$ frame i wanted at the eye doctor's. Anyway, i shall go now, put on socks and shoes, and go to the park. ^_^

-Friday, November 16, 2001-
If I was an Autobot, I'd be:

Take the Transformers personality test at android5.com!

-Wednesday, November 14, 2001-
Did you know that velcro is virtually impossible to pull apart horizontally?

-Monday, November 12, 2001-
Look at me, look at me!! I bought a new shirt!! Its so neat. Its from old navy, it has a neato little red design thingie, and its a tannish long-john style shirt. It looks so neat, i'm going to wear it with the plaid pants i got on Friday. :3!! *dance* *actually feels kind of good looking* I'm such a clothes-horse! I love clothes. :3!!! *is very much a girl* YAY i have tea now. Green Tea! It has been a while since i've had Green Tea, as usually i drink my Tension Tamer stuff.

I'm getting ideas of what to ask for for Christmas. Starting with Playstation 2 games! Yes folks, finally we got a used system traded in at work, and i promptly stuck a note in it and shrink-wrapped it. The note reads "This is Kayla's! Touch it and DIE! love, kayla ^_^". baha. Anyway, so yes i shall have a playstation 2 shortly. I need ICO, Tony Hawk 3, Devil May Cry, DOA 2, Kessen II, Super Street Fighter, Yanya, Metal Gear Solid 2, and of course, when it comes out, Final Fantasy X. Aside from video games, i want a shopping spree in montrose, for clothes and art supplies, i want either this perfume stuff from Bath and Body works or just a gift certificate to bath and body works, i want aaanimeeee. OHH and there are two Bettie Page things i want; one is a big poster from Past and Presents, the other is a tee shirt from Freestyles. Geez, i'm selfish, LOL, listing all these things i want. But i also can't wait to buy things for people. I LOVE buying things for people. I like to make people happy :3! and most people are happy with things. *nod* things are fun.

Meowwwww, i'm going to go write to corrigan now *bounds off*

-Saturday, November 10, 2001-
Yay i had a great day. Yesterday was a football game, we actually won. I ended up with killer cramps, but they went away eventually after 3 Ibuproufens. After the game, we (myself, Ken, Rayna, Cole, Sherri, Kevin, Erik, Mike, and Mike's girlfriend) went to IHOP till about 12:30. I stayed the night at Ken's house. Today we went over to her mom's house at 11ish for food, and Corrigan came over. We watched The Man in the Iron Mask, which was completely rad. Then we left for the Region Choir Concert in Katy. Ate at Jason's deli, got there just as the Freshman choir started to sing. It was all really good. :D After the concert ended at about 6:30, we stayed and chatted with min'na, then we (a new we, myself, Ken, Corrigan, Cole, Kate, Jason Palmer, and Katie Radke) went to Baskin Robins! Yay for ice cream. Kendie's back died as we were leaving to go to her house. Sooo she laid in the back of Corrigan's car on the way. We watched Rocky Horror Picture Show. Ken, Kate, and I did the Time Warp...Cole and Corrigan (holy shit, too many 'k' sounds) looked at us like we were absolutely insane, as neither of them had ever seen it. I got to spend all day with my best friends and my boyfriend. The only bad thing is that i had to go home early, as my parents wanted me to do so. My dad griped at me for inconveniencing the family, he's still in a crappy mood. Oh well. I work tomorrow from noon to close. Not bad, its money. And i get to boss around trainees. *cackle* ^_^_^_^_^

Mwee. I like corrigan so much! I must be kind of stupid...guy dumps kayla for ex...ex dumps guy for ex...guy wants kayla back...kayla happy because kayla gets guy back. LAAahh...it was so nice spending all day with him. *happy happy happy*

-Thursday, November 8, 2001-
I have new stickers for Less Claypool's case...a Rob Zombie, The Calling, Ozomatli, and a Reporter (the newspaper) sticker. :3 yayness. I want to be...i want to be an aimless punk today. I want to go on a shopping spree in Montrose. I want to play trumpet like Brad Dunham. I want to be a drama queen! i want to see Corrigan, i want to hang out with Kendall, i want to play DDR! I'm in a good mood today. I watched the second Fushigi Yuugi OVA last night...all i have is the third left. *gasp* the third is the dramatic one...where Tasuki tries to get Miaka *cry* MIAKA YOU WHORE leave my Tasuki alone! *_*_*_*_* Tasuuuukkiiiiii...aiishiteru, Tasuki-san! *gush* I'm going to meet Hayashi Nobutoshi some day, and tell him "O.O I LOVE YOU, TASUKI" and hopefully he'll be all in-character and whatnot. I would die...*_* mwee...

Boys behind me are listening to Weezer. Weezer's okay. I dont mind them, in fact, i really like quite a few of their songs. Their overall sound is a bit too mellow to me though. I like fast paced ska and punk. :3

I wish i could fly.

-Wednesday, November 7, 2001-
YAY kendall thinks i hate her. -_-; I kind of wonder what i'm doing wrong. Bet its cause i never hang out with her anymore. I guess that just means the days i dont go home with her and hang out. So, i guess by being in band, and having a job, and doing homework, i'm avoiding my friends. Let's see, Friday was Erik's party, which she was at. Saturday all day i was at band, and then she came home with me until i got too tired to stand. Sunday i worked and went to a movie with Janice after work. Monday i worked. Tuesday i did homework from when i got home to when i went to bed. Today i have band. This Friday i have a game, and we'll probably go out after that. I'll probably hang out with her after school on Thursday too. Okay, so in one week, it appears that i have actually been social with one other person. Guess that means i hate her. -_-;; Oh, and by the way, I have not seen Corrigan since Halloween. Maybe i should just put any responsibility aside and do what i want. Ha ha. -_-;

-Tuesday, November 6, 2001-
YAY!!! Mom washed my blanket!!!!! *gush* *huggles blanket* *_*_* I love you so...i've missed you, blanket-chan!! T__T My blanket...

-Tuesday, November 6, 2001-
Oh yeah, i found out i failed Pre Cal this six weeks. I'm so stupid when it comes to math, and its so hard for me to understand and pay attention to my teacher. I wish i could get this. I HATE failing courses. I wanted to keep all of my grades to be C or above this year, and i'm doing alright except for now. Always math, always i can't get it. I hate being stupid.

-Tuesday, November 6, 2001-
Yes!! Its up!! A week and a half of not posting, but at least i have a new layout!! *is proud* Bahaha, Bettie Page is so rad (see, Corrigan, i use the word 'rad'). I did most of this in webmastering today, but some i tweaked at home. Mwee. Now i'm going to go play trumpet or something. Wheeee!!